SMALL GROUP GUIDELINES

 

SAFE GROUP

This is a safe group. We will do our part to create an environment where everyone can be real, open and honest with their struggles and victories.

CONFIDENTIALITY

Confidentiality is key. What is said in the group stays in the group.

LISTEN

Be sure to listen well. Let's value one another during our discussions by really listening to what is being shared.

Try to avoid thinking about how you are going to respond or what you are going to say next.


PAUSE

Allow a pause in conversation after someone shares to give the person sharing the chance to finish and the group the opportunity to consider what was just shared before responding.


SILENCE

Allow silence in the group.  It is important to allow silence in the group as it provides an opportunity for someone to share and for members in the group to process the topic or question being considered.

 
NO “CROSS TALK”

Be considerate of others as they are sharing.  No side conversations.

 
NO FIXING

We are not here to fix each other; Jesus does that part. Give encouragement, speak truth, and point to Jesus. Don’t try to solve or fix each other.

 
NO RESCUING

When people are sharing something deeply personal there can be a tendency to try and make them feel better about themselves or the situation by providing immediate condolences.

This will often cause them to stop sharing. Resist the temptation to rescue people.

 
BE SELF-AWARE

Be self-aware of how you are personally affecting the environment through your words, actions and non-verbal communication.

 
“I” STATEMENTS

Use “I” statements. It’s easy to talk about the issues of others, but we want to share with each other. Try to use “I” statements rather than “them”, “they”, “we, “us”, “the church”, etc.

 
SHARING

We want everyone to have a chance to share. Be sensitive about the amount of time you share.

 
CONFLICT RESOLUTION

We will commit to resolve conflict biblically. When conflict or sin issues between group members arise, we want to make sure that we are honoring God and each other in the way we deal with these issues. The following are a few key Scripture references regarding conflict resolution (there are many other).

  • Someone has sinned against you  (Matthew 18:15-20)

  • Forgiving a sinner  (Colossians 3:12-13)

  • Restoring someone who is in sin  (Galatians 6:1-5)

  • Reconciling differences  (Matthew 5:23-24; Matthew 7:1-5)